Wishes

Funny New Year Wishes

These funny New Year wishes for 2027 are for anyone who'd rather get a laugh than a lump in the throat at midnight.

The jokes are gentle, so they're safe for the family chat and most offices. They poke fun at resolutions, staying up late, January gyms and the grand tradition of writing the wrong year on everything.

Resolution jokesMidnight and party jokesJokes about the year itselfTeasing wishes for friends and family

Resolution jokes

  1. My New Year's resolution is to stop making resolutions I won't keep. Nailed it already.
    WhatsAppMake card
  2. Happy New Year! May your resolutions survive at least until the second Tuesday of January.
    WhatsAppMake card
  3. This year I'm going to be more positive. I'm positive I won't go to the gym.
    WhatsAppMake card
  4. Resolution for 2027: drink more water. Specifically, the water in coffee.
    WhatsAppMake card
  5. I resolve to read more in 2027. Starting with this text. Happy New Year!
    WhatsAppMake card
  6. My goal for 2027 is to be the person my dog thinks I am. Results may vary.
    WhatsAppMake card
  7. New Year's resolution: stop procrastinating. I'll start on Monday.
    WhatsAppMake card

Midnight and party jokes

  1. Happy New Year! I'll be asleep by 10:30, but my spirit will be at the party.
    WhatsAppMake card
  2. Here's to another year of pretending I know the words to Auld Lang Syne.
    WhatsAppMake card
  3. May your champagne be cold and your neighbors' fireworks end before 1 a.m.
    WhatsAppMake card
  4. Happy New Year! I watched the ball drop. Then I watched my energy drop.
    WhatsAppMake card
  5. Wishing you a midnight kiss, or at least a midnight snack.
    WhatsAppMake card
  6. Countdown status: 10, 9, 8... where did I put my drink?
    WhatsAppMake card

Jokes about the year itself

  1. Happy New Year! Enjoy writing 2026 on everything until March.
    WhatsAppMake card
  2. 2026 was a lot. 2027, please read the room.
    WhatsAppMake card
  3. May 2027 be the year your Wi-Fi is strong and your excuses are weak.
    WhatsAppMake card
  4. Happy New Year! It's the one night it's socially acceptable to stay up to watch a ball go down a pole.
    WhatsAppMake card
  5. New year, same group chat that never agrees on a restaurant.
    WhatsAppMake card
  6. May your 2027 have more paydays than Mondays. (Mathematically impossible, but we can dream.)
    WhatsAppMake card
  7. 2027: because 2026 needed a sequel.
    WhatsAppMake card

Teasing wishes for friends and family

  1. Happy New Year! Thanks for being weird with me for another year.
    WhatsAppMake card
  2. I hope 2027 brings you everything you want, except my snacks.
    WhatsAppMake card
  3. May your plans go smoothly and your relatives ask fewer questions.
    WhatsAppMake card
  4. Happy New Year to my favorite person to complain with.
    WhatsAppMake card
  5. Wishing you a year where you finally find the other sock.
    WhatsAppMake card
  6. Here's to 365 more days of me sending you memes instead of actual messages.
    WhatsAppMake card

Funny wishes land best when they fit the person. A resolution joke is perfect for the friend who signs up for a gym every January, while a time joke suits family members who always fall asleep before midnight. Add a GIF or a photo for extra effect.

Frequently asked questions

What is a funny thing to say on New Year's?

Try "Happy New Year! May your resolutions survive at least until the second Tuesday of January." Jokes about resolutions and staying up late are relatable and safe for most audiences.

What is a good funny New Year text for friends?

Something like "I hope 2027 brings you everything you want, except my snacks" works well. Teasing that's clearly affectionate is the sweet spot with friends.

Are funny New Year wishes okay for coworkers?

Yes, as long as the humor is light and about shared experiences like Mondays, email or resolutions. Avoid jokes about colleagues, politics or pay.

More wishes and messages